The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.

The International Rules of Manhood

1. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2. It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.
3. Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
7. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10. You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
11. It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
12. Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
13. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
14. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
15. If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
16. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
17. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
18. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
19. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
20. Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
21. Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
23. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
24. The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.
25. It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
26. Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
27. The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
28. There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below.


"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"


"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!"


We hope this clears up any confusion.


The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.

LIFE is running behind schedule

omg omg id life crisis im 25 this yearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ok im finding it hard to accept the truth that im getting aged and life is moving very fast......how frustrating it is when most of yr friends are married and u r left with 3 bachelors boys who dont even know what they want in life ? ah comeon it sounds silly when i say i dun go out with anyone these days caus i find my options to be so unclickable and i dun find anything interesting at all, ok i dont want to waste money and time watching some stupid 3hr movie in the theater.. neither i wan go to the same pub drink the same thing and dance for the same tune over again and again.. i know i have to spend time with my friends but do something that we all haven done before.. im really finding it so boring these days nothing new in life same old sicky days hoping for the sun rise...

to be continued...

Sick

Yes im sick, mentally sick i dunno whats goin thru my mind these days..to be frank im really fed up i dun find a purpose in living this way..loneliness is really haunting me and im sick of talking with pillows which is not responding back...what i need is a bit mercy a piece of love a glance of care and a pinch of concern..my mind is full of destructive thoughts i wont be surprised if i crack earth into 2 pieces, im not jealous i dun hate anything still why the fuck i dun have some fucking peace in my mind..why am i so restless...i thought it was al the printed notes makin life miserable but not mine i have it enuff with me and im making a lot too....gawd i dunno wat i did wrong i dun even rememeber hurting anyone ? i hardly talk with pple now a days.. i have no clue.. to the almight pls dun make me hate life and do something stupid..give me the strength...

All By Myself

When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
Livin' alone
I think of all the friends I've known
When I dial the telephone
Nobody's home

All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore

Hard to be sure
Sometimes I feel so insecure
And loves so distant and obscure
Remains the cure

All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
All by myself
Anymore

When I was young
I never needed anyone
Making love was just for fun
Those days are gone

All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
Oh
Don't wanna live
By myself, by myself
Anymore
By myself
Anymore
Oh
All by myself
Don't wanna live
I never, never, never
Needed anyone

All By Myself~ Celine Dionby Eric Carmen/Sergei Rachmaninoff

sicky friday

awwwe im sittin sick on ma sofa watchin tv in mute and listening to the next door lady scolding her little child... i want to sleep forever but i realised my shoulder is strong since it has a lot of load on it and atleast let my life be a benifit to another 10 pple..let it be...tommorows are becoming days of no hope, i dunno wat happiness exactly is ? is it a short period relaxing feeling ? i dunno if it is suppose to be a short time or long time feeling but wateve it is i only know about short time..anyways im still in search of my life purpose i dont want to endup like the normal man life i want to be part of the history else i want to giveup myself now right now..i badly need a psycharist i want to cure my mind...im sick sick sick!

Break down period

2009 is not much happening...and i dunno if my life will be anymore happening after tommo..gosh im gonna miss my partner my friend my brother my good supportive and a wing of my shoulder. i hope i will have the strength to withstand this tommorow...life is so damn unfair when u are being fair to urself...to my sweety lovable sister thanks for the wonderful birthday card of ur size :) haha it is really lovely i know u not gonan read this but wat to do helpless brother can only type this here no means to contact you sweetie anyways infuture if you happen to read this post u should know this i love you..love u a lot my sweetie little cute potato..i miss you a lot...i keep having ammu's memories always and i dunno how im mentally balancing..yest i moulded in the bus on the way to office thinking of her i really miss the time i had with her thankgod im not in kerala now else i would have been turned to a mad dog by now..now i know things happening are for good and it has reasons of its own...i dunno why i feel im being emotional which im not im very active but my thoughts and mind are lost somewhere else and my actions doesnt relate to any so weird..